Here is a little fun fact for your day: the hashtag #selfcare has been used on Instagram a staggering 32.3 million times. Even better, #selflove has been used 46.6 million times. To take it even higher, #loveyourself has been used an incredible 61.8 million times. In comparison, #loveyourneighbor has been used only 259 thousand times. When you consider our present-day society, that should all sound about right.

I love Parks and Rec. Ron Swanson is one of my great fictional heroes. One of the downfalls of the show’s popularity has been a serious adoption of the “treat yo-self” mentality made famous by Aziz Ansari’s character, Tom Haverford, and his dear work friend, Donna Meagle. Once a year, the pair of pals hit the town to spend money exclusively on themselves. It’s a fun and exciting concept, and a special and highly anticipated day for them. Its true value for them comes from its uniqueness and rarity. When the general population took hold of this idea of treating yourself, self-care, and self-love, it implemented them as the top priority, encouraging people to indulge in such activities way more frequently than an annual trip.

The general increase in promoting self-acceptance is an admirable movement. It is certainly better to appreciate the life you’ve been given than to not. Your life includes your body, your mind, your personality, and all other aspects of your whole person. We should value these things. We should be good stewards of them. But even Tom Haverford, in all his immaturity and craziness, knew that treating himself was not ever meant to be his top priority.

In the busyness of our everyday lives, we all need to have some type of rest, relaxation, and recreation. However, our approach to these has been distorted into a different form than what God intended.

Let’s talk about rest. When I think about a rest day, I think about physical fitness icons like Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, or four-time CrossFit Champion Rich Froning. These guys take rest days. On those days, they allow themselves to take in some unhealthy calories and splurge on some desserts. It’s often an active rest day that includes some light exercise and stretching, and these rest days are earned. They don’t come frivolously from just doing their simple, expected daily tasks of living. They come from hours of intense, hard work. That is when we rest, after we have gone above and beyond and put in the work needed for greatness.

Now, let’s talk about relaxation. Relaxation is the state of being free from tension or anxiety. Think about when you are told to hold a certain uncomfortable position while stretching or exercising and the instructor then tells you to relax. It doesn’t mean the work is over, it just means to take a break to reset. This allows you to refocus your mental and physical energy. In a similar way, getting yourself relaxed outside of these circumstances doesn’t have to be a complete or total distancing of yourself and your responsibilities. You can remain relatively free from tension and anxiety in your everyday life. In fact, God is calling you to cast all your anxieties, cares, and worries on Him constantly through prayer and the sacraments. Jesus didn’t use sarcasm, so when He tells you He wants you free of fear and worry, He means it. If you’re constantly living in a state of escalated stress, but also have a weak prayer life, it is time to fix that. Jesus doesn’t eliminate all stress and concern through prayer, but He does use it to get rid of most of it.

Finally, let’s address recreation. What is a recreation facility? It’s usually a place for fitness and physical activity of some sort. Just because it’s time to step away from your work and professional responsibilities doesn’t mean you have to go waste time with useless activities. We should all strive to be intentional with our free time. This means that we use our time to literally re-create ourselves through fitness, reading, learning, quality time with others, and whatever else helps us to be our best. Recreation doesn’t have to be laying on the couch eating unhealthy snacks while binge-watching some mentally numbing Netflix show on serial killers. Recreation, i.e. stress relieving activities, can actually be productive. In the long run, the more productive we are with our time, the less stressed we will be.

Being productive in this sense is a subjective experience. I’m not suggesting that you have to constantly produce things for others to see, but I am proposing that a strong majority of your time should be utilized in either service to others or bettering yourself. There is simply no reason why you shouldn’t finish at least a book per month. There is no good reason why you should never exercise. There is no good reason why you can’t pray at least 15 minutes per day.

We have to change the way we view these things and ourselves.

We have to change the way we prioritize our time, which will in turn change what we are willing to stress over.

I should be more concerned about not praying daily, not exercising, not learning, and not serving others powerfully than I am about my job, my family drama, or any political problems facing our country. When I focus on the things within my sphere of control, I am able to exercise the power that I do have over my life. If I do that, then I can get my own world in order to the extent that I am capable. When I can lay my head down at night knowing that I gave God, others, and myself my very best, I can sleep in great peace.

This is what taking good care of yourself truly means. It means being a good steward of yourself: mind, body, and soul. It means you prioritize the things that make you a better human being, but not just out of self-interest. We prioritize these things in the same manner that we prioritize putting on our own oxygen mask in the event of a plane crash. We put on our mask first so that we will be physically able and available to help others who desperately need us. If we are incapacitated, we will be of no use to anyone.

If you neglect the things that nourish your mind, body, and soul, you won’t be able to powerfully love and serve those around you. You won’t be able to be an honorable citizen of your community, our country, or the Kingdom of God if you fail to rest, relax, and recreate in a way that brings you closer to the man or woman God created you to be.

Don’t buy in to the world’s view of treating yourself. It will leave you empty and wanting.

I encourage you to invest in yourself. Push yourself. Do the work that is required to fulfill your potential. You might be surprised at how stress relieving it really is. There’s something about seeking excellence that can drastically improve one’s self-image. And when you’re at your best, you will be able to ultimately fulfill your life’s purpose. Choose your purpose over simple pleasure, and be sure to have fun while doing so!

Nathan Crankfield is a convert to the Catholic faith. He is a proud graduate of Bishop McDevitt High School, Mount St. Mary's University, and US Army Ranger School. After serving four years of active duty in the US Army, he joined the staff at Dynamic Catholic as a parish consultant. Find more of his writing by visiting our blog section here